…on teaching our sons how to honor womanhood
This mom life thing has been an everyday journey into the unknown for me. Especially with all these BOYS! Being raised in
a house with 4 women and 1 man I was always in the majority. Oh but now! I’m the only woman in a house full of testosterone and it is quite an adventure. Like when I yelled “BAE!” just now and my 4-year-old came to answer with a ” yeeesss??” or how my 1-year-old went swimming in the tub, fully clothed about an hour ago…or having to untie knots in my good silk scarves because my six-year-old thinks he’s 007 – the Idris version.
With three boys, it seems like I’m always watching my back or ducking for cover. In the urban dictionary next to the word “boy”, there go my three – skinnin’ and grinnin’.
But having boys isn’t all messy, at times it can be the sweetest thing. Growing up in a house full of girls (who were ALL required to be very “ladylike”) I don’t remember ever bringing my mom flowers. My boys, they bring me flowers daily – even if they’re really just yard weeds (or jacked from the neighbors landscaping). They love to lavish me with gifts and kind words. Especially the middle child. He’s Mr. Lover Man. He notices everytime I change my hair or take some time to beat my face. (Yes he’s gonna make a great husband. No, he’s not available.)
Of course, Mr. Daddy-Man is a shining example of how to treat a woman but I believe that when I embrace my woman-ness it naturally activates their masculine need to care for and protect the feminine essence. I want them to be careful and protective with all women, that’s why I make sure they see womanhood in action at home. No, lipstick and curls poppin’ don’t make me more feminine than the next woman. I’m not talking about “girly” as much as I am about being vulnerable.
See, I was raised by “strong” women who said things like “never let’em see you sweat”. They believed that your children should never see you cry. I want my boys to know that I’m human, I have feelings. I don’t ever want them to forget that I’m woman and that it’s OK for me to be a bit softer. Not only me, but it’s OK for them to feel.
I’ve heard that many schools are promoting a gender-neutral agenda, I can’t really speak to the effects of that on the minds of young boys. Our boys are homeschooled and within our community, we haven’t adopted that way of thinking. We’re raising them to be gender specific (is that a thing?) on purpose. Not in a chauvinist way, but in a way that helps them appreciate and honor the differences between men and women.
I appreciate being a woman. So much so that I work to help other women appreciate their womanhood through the Master Queendom Masterclass and the Queen Maintenance Kit. I find that the more I honor my own femininity, the more the men around me do the same by being supportive, protective, and kind. It’s not an admission of weakness on my part – I think we all know how strong women are…because childbirth, periods, and errrthang else. I allow the men around me to be of service – especially my sons. By doing so, I cultivate a safe space for myself where I don’t have to be super, I can just be me.
…and truthfully, we teach our boys to honor true womanhood because I want them to attract a good woman – cuz mama has no qualms about jacking a young girl up over these three kings. Sweet ain’t weak!